A Moment of Silence

Today we remember the greatest icon in entertainment. At seventy one, The Pillsbury Doughboy passed on of a yeast infection combined with trauma from repeated belly poking.

P. Doughdy as he was known by his close personal friends, was laid to rest in a lightly greased coffin. Celebrities from all walks of life came out to pay respects, including; Betty Crocker, Hungry
Jack, Mrs. Buttersworth, Oh’ Henry, the Twinkies and of course his long standing acquaintance Captain Crunch. Pictures showed his grave piled high with flours…

Aunty Jemima gave the eulogy. describing him as a man who kneaded people as much as they kneaded him. His rise in show business came quickly, but his later years were filled with turnovers. Many considered him to be a smart cookie, but noticed that he spent much of his hard earned dough on half-baked investments. Despite his flakiness at times, doughboy worked hard not to
become a crusty old man, but rather stay as a roll model for the next generation.

Doughboy’s wife Play Dough and their children Jane, John and Dosey have vowed they will fill his shoes and work hard to take his place in the oven. His father, Pop Tart was not available for comment.

The public funeral is being held at three fifty and should last for about twenty minutes.

Let us all rise to the occasion of blessing our Icon, Pilsburry Doughboy. May you bask in the warmth and glory of the eternal oven.