Heaven and Hell – Funny Jokes

August 21, 2007 · Print This Article

An employment interviewer was knocked down by a bus and died. Her soul arrived at the Pearly Gates, where St Peter welcomed her.
“We’ve never had an employment interviewer make it this far before, and we’re not really sure what to do with you,” he said. “We’ve been instructed to give you one day in Hell and one in Heaven, and let you choose where you’d like to stay for all eternity.”

“I think I’d prefer Heaven,” said the woman.

“Sorry, we have rules,” replied St Peter, and he put the employment interviewer on to the downward escalator.

As the doors opened in Hell, she stepped out on to a beautiful golf course. In the distance was a country club around her were many friends, all happy and cheering for her. They ran up and kissed her and talked about old times. They played a perfect round of golf and ate steak and lobster. The employment interviewer met the Devil (who was actually rather nice) and she had a wonderful night telling jokes and dancing.

But before she knew it, it was time to leave. Everyone shook her hand and waved goodbye as she stepped on to the elevator, which took her back to the Pearly Gates.

St Peter was waiting for her. “Now it’s time to spend a day in Heaven,” he said.

So the employment interviewer spent the next 24 hours lounging around on clouds, playing the harp and singing – which was almost as enjoyable as her day in Hell.

At the day’s end, St Peter returned and said: “You’ve spent a day in Hell and a day in Heaven. You must now choose.”

The woman thought for a second and replied: “Well, Heaven is certainly lovely, but I actually had a better time in Hell. So I choose Hell.”

But on her return, she found herself standing in a desolate wasteland covered in garbage and filth. Her friends were dressed in rags, picking up rubbish and putting it in old sacks. The Devil approached and put his arm around her.

“I don’t understand,” stuttered the employment interviewer. “Yesterday, there was a golf course and a country club. We ate lobster, and danced, and had a wonderful, happy time. Now there is just a dirty wasteland of garbage, and all my friends look miserable.”

The Devil smiled and said: “Yesterday we were recruiting you. Today, you’re staff.”


Got something to say?